Up a half hour before my alarm. I laid there listening to house sounds, Troy’s heavy breathing, not quite a snore, and the tinkle of Maddies collar as she gets comfy again.
I moved to my quiet room, now coffee In Hand.
It’s that time of year I want to keep busy and not think too much.
I lost my mom in December 13 years ago.
A part of me blames myself.
I feel guilty for the times I rushed down to Lawton but was too busy to swing by and say hello, see her face, hold her hand, hug her.
And now, that’s impossible.
Sometimes when I look in the mirror, I see her. It’s amazing how much I look like her.
I hear her words cross my lips at times.
I miss her.
I still have conversations with her, well, I talk, she listens.
The day I died, I believe she was one of the voices in that white room. Guiding me once more. Such an overwhelming sense of peace surrounded me.
I know she watches over me.
Being my guardian angel would be way too much work, but she is here with me.
Once in a while the passenger seat belt light will come on for no reason.
No earthly reason.
I say hello Mom and it goes out.
Don’t miss the chance to say I love you.
Hugs, I love you
Lorene