Its quiet.
My happy coffee is hot.
I can hear the air conditioner and Maddie’s dog tag jingling when she rearranges herself in the bed.
I’m sure she just moved into my warm spot.
Snuggled up to Big Daddy.
I haven’t shaved my legs in a week, so he may not realize it’s not me. #locksoflove
It’s a wonderful feeling when someone loves you unconditionally. I can be a hard pill to swallow at times.
I try to keep kindness in the forefront and my personal pain hidden. We are all stressed and going through something at one time or another, no reason to spread hurt or pain.
If I do snap, I try to be quick to apologize.
I am human, Contrary to popular belief. I have a heart that pumps blood, not ice water. I know this for fact, my heart doctor has been inside with a camera to make sure for me.
I have feelings that get hurt. You may never know if you did it, however I have been known to tell some people I care about “you hurt me”. If they care, their actions or words won’t repeat. But at least I know I spoke up and if it happens again I can reevaluate that person’s position in my life.
I won’t keep people in my circle that deliberately hurt me. I don’t care who they are.
And you shouldn’t either.
I am responsible for my happiness.
No one can make me happy unless I am a willing participant.
I choose who I let in my life and who I shut the door on.
Sometimes with a deadbolt.
With any luck and the grace of God. I have another 45 years or so left on this planet.
Yes. I plan on living to be 100.
And those 45 years will be spent being happy and living life based on all the lessons learned in the past 56 years.
And there have been a lot!
The most important lesson is I’ve learned to love me.
I thought I needed the love of someone else to be happy. I reached out, some good some bad decisions. Some I try to wipe from my memory.
The feel of someone’s arms around me made me feel needed and wanted.
As I learned to love me, I realized that was all a facade, fake. A blanket wrapped around me of false feelings and hope.
No one can love me like I love me.
Its different.
Its a revelation.
It makes me demand a more pure love from the people I hold close.
It was a long road to get here, but I am.
Attitude and all.
And because I love me, I can allow others to also.
And when I love others,
Its big.
Love big my friends and start with you.
Lorene
