Back in my castle. Surgery was a successful eviction of my gallbladder. It took an extra incision but he is out of there. Thank you Dr. Patel. Sandy, Danielle and Dana (I think I got the names right, my brain is still foggy)were the best nurses with before and after care. My anesthesiologist, my brain cant find his name, helped me with the best nap! And Luther, our surgery director for wheeling me down. I got home about 130 and have been napping and walking like I was told. I have made it to the couch and trying to see if sitting up is a good move. Troy has been with me making sure I don’t do anything I’m not supposed to do. Because he is amazing. I am trying to catch up on all my messages, my phone has been off so I could rest. Thank you everyone for checking on me and Troy for being my private secretary. I’ll be back to as normal as I get in no time. ❤❤
It doesn’t take much to make me happy. Champagne, caviar… More like a margarita and nachos. Simple things. Simple people Simple life. My simple is exciting. Snuggled up on the couch with Troy and Maddie, watching a movie. Maddie and I sharing his lap because Lord knows she doesn’t like me in her territory. A char grilled steak, hand rubbed with spices and love, cooked on the back deck by my man. Served on Bistro dishes, plated perfectly with potatoes and veggies. Seated at the kitchen island with the best company around. No one waiting for our table, no rushing, no bread loaf with butter, no tablecloth or candles. Simple and perfect. Standing at the kitchen sink, watching out the window together. The bird feeder is full of our feathered friends. We watch as they take turns, push each other over, the males standing guard and sometimes hitting the feeder so feed falls to the ground and is easily scooped up by the females. Thirty minutes will pass in a second. Simple time together. Perfect again. My morning quiet time is as simple as it gets. Me and my thoughts. Sometimes written, sometimes not. A warm blanket, hot coffee. House sounds and peace. The best part of simple. No fame, no fortune, at least not in a bank. My biggest asset is Love ❤ How perfect is that? It may be simple. Oh, but its Big. Lorene
So I’m sipping the last of today’s water consumption before surgery tomorrow. I’m going to hate not having my coffee in the morning. I’ve had my first shower with surgical scrub, too bad it’s not fat melting too. Not being able to apply lotion makes me growl. My skin is so dry, hands are chapped from washing them so much. I’ll be slathering it on like Buffalo Bill’s houseguest tomorrow night. I’m not looking forward to the inconvenience but my body probably needs the down time. I know my staff will knock it out of the park and take care of business. I’ll catch up on some writing, because a pen and paper will be about what I’m allowed to lift. I have faith God will guide Dr. Amish Patel in removing one of those extra parts he threw into creation for good measure. Possibly one way to prove he has a sense of humor. Maybe the slow her down organ, a sure way to make me take a break. Anyway, please keep me in your prayers, I’m looking forward to getting back to it quickly and as painlessly as possible. I tried to get a tummy tuck added to the procedure but that was a no go. So I’ll bring my Thanksgiving pants to go home in, you know the elastic banded ones. And hope the scars are a base for a cool tattoo. Good night and sweet dreams, I’ll bother you more tomorrow. Maybe drugged induced 😳 Lorene
Good morning, I hope you are enjoying some quiet coffee time. I am the keeper of the kitchen this morning so I am up making coffee and starting breakfast. Bacon is in the oven so I decided to sit and just listen. It’s not the normal home sounds. Someone’s phone alarm going off, I think I hear a snore here and there. Everyone sleeping off the excitement of us all getting together and seeing each other again. For some it’s been months, others over a year. But now just seems like yesterday. Just as coffee warms my soul, so does gatherings like this. Everyone has their own unique talents, baking, decorating, organizing, storytelling and more. Listening to the laughter, singing and chatting just makes you feel at home. Makes for a perfect weekend. I miss waking to Big Daddy and Queen Maddie, my cozy quiet space and sitting with just a blanket, but missing them makes me appreciate them more. It affirms I have a wonderful life. Not perfect, but close. Very close I love big, and am loved big in return. Ahhhhhh, I smell bacon. Guess I better get back to cooking for my tribe. One of the ways I love big. Kiss!
I’m in my space. Yes What a way to start the morning. A little late, I slept in a bit. I’m off work today. Actually til at least next Monday, I have my gallbladder surgery this Monday. But the weekend is for fun and relaxing. A ladies retreat. Time away from testosterone, stress of work, everyday BS. A place where no one judges what you eat, actually encourages it, loves whatever you are lounging about in, pajamas or a little black dress, and will laugh or cry with you, which ever you need at any given moment. No cliques. No judgement. No drama. Just sisterly love. Belonging It feels good to belong. Building friendships can be hard. These ladies make it so easy. You cant help but feel like a village, even when we are apart. Daily communication. Celebrations of life events. Helping one another in hard times. Last minute lunch or dinner gatherings. Someone is always reaching out. A network a women from all aspects of life and careers, supporting each other, mentoring each other, loving each other. I spoke about having amazing people in my life the other day. This group is right out there with the best. I know there is always one a phone call away that will encourage me to be my best. Be in my corner. And I am there for them. I truly hope you have at least one person in your life that is as amazing as these ladies. Be sure and thank them today for just being there. Now, don’t wait. Thank you ladies, I’m so looking forward to the retreat, cooking, visiting and laughing. Laughing is so good for the soul. And so are relationships like ours. I love you all! Kiss! Lorene
Waiting for my coffee to cool a bit, I am scrolling through pictures on my phone. I have thousands of them. Some are ones I have taken, some screenshots, some I stole off the internet. Grandbabies, fur babies, recipes and food. Lots of food. I have an entire folder of food. I believe you eat with your eyes first. If it’s a beautiful plate, it will automatically taste 20% better. Sure food can taste good if it’s a brown mess on your plate, but a plate so gorgeous you cant wait to dive in? That’s dining. Even at home, make it a dining experience. Pour your OJ in a wine glass, eat your ham sandwich and chips on the good china. You are worth it. Take your time. Enjoy. At Bistro Lorene, I refused to have “baskets” for food. Your chicken salad sandwich was cut in half, placed on a glass plate, pickled okra on the side, your house made chips piled in the center. So what if it was just lunch, or you only had 30 minutes, it was a meal, an experience, nourishment to help you through the day. I may be the only person on the planet that feels that way about food. Don’t get me wrong, I have eaten pizza out of the box, sampled dinner so much standing at the stove I am no longer hungry and I have snuggled on the couch with chips and slim Jim’s. No matter, food is an experience. Maybe I need to contract myself out as a restaurant consultant. Maybe not, I am too picky. 🤣😳 Troy calls me a food snob. This entire post is just making me hungry. Lol. I’ll be home a few days after surgery Monday, maybe I’ll play in the kitchen again. I miss cooking for my Bistro friends. Anyway, my mind is wandering to fresh farm eggs and grass fed butter…. Back to my coffee and the start of another day. Food is life my friends! Experience it today, don’t just woof it down. Savor each bite. Later my friends, Chef Lorene
Its Friday, I should be excited. Oh. And payday so. Woo hoo! Well, let’s not get too excited about the paycheck, everyone else has dibs on it. The electric company may have a lien on it because of the winter storm. I just want to sit with my coffee on the couch. Wrapped in my blanket listening to the house sounds. I don’t want to “people” today. I want to write, nap, snuggle my fur baby. Rearrange my home office, no TV, no phone. Be alone with me. I love my people. Don’t get me wrong, but sometimes I need to reconnect with me. Go over life decisions and plans. See if I am on track for my goals and dreams. Maybe rewrite my personal standard operating procedures so I get where I want to go faster. My life is my business so to speak. I need to have a business plan to keep on track. Goals, dreams, things I want to achieve. When major events happen, sometimes you have to readjust the game plan. So I will take some time, but not today, today I must adult. But soon, I will write down, in pencil, what I want to accomplish this year and in the future, how I plan to get there and what obstacles I need to overcome. I will live my best life. And I will always Love Big. I pray you do the same. Lorene
I have been surrounded by amazing people my entire life. You hear a lot about my hubby. Big Daddy, Troy if that is more comfortable to say. I’m not the only one that calls him that. He’s been a Daddy so to speak for many kids over the past years. A father figure for several. I would say amazing. Of course there is my Mom. Orchid. As beautiful as the flower itself. A young woman in the 60’s that chose to keep me Although plans fell through and she would be a single parent. Made my life a good one. Chose the perfect man to help raise me. Taught me to cook and encouraged me to be able to take care of myself. She too is amazing. God rest her soul. My Daddy, Dudley. The man who accepted me as his own. I was a Daddy’s girl. To this day, before I make decisions I ask myself it would make my dad proud. As a pregnant 17 year I was scared. I was living on my own determined to be a great single mom. He was the one who packed my things and moved me back home. He said “you are not having this baby without me.” I knew I had disappointed him with my choices, but he was the proudest grandpa I’ve ever seen. Truly Amazing. God rest his soul, I lost him 5 months later. My cousins, growing up together, they truly are your first best friends. Sharing time and secrets. Racing through childhood together. Family holidays at the grandparents. Life puts time and space between us, but sharing on Facebook has made it possible to watch them and their families grow. Amazing Childhood friends, you know the ones, they are considered family now. The ones you haven’t seen or spoke with for 10 years and the day you do it seems like no time has passed. I have friends that held my hand in that maternity ward, reassuring me I could do it. Held me when my daddy died. Babysat for me so I could work and not worry about daycare. Loved me when I felt unlovable. Married me and let me go, staying friends. Remind me they are glad I’m a part of their lives. Texts out of the blue, reminding me someone thinks about me. Fed me pizza. Took care of me after eye surgery when I was blind and drugged. Told me I was beautiful. I could go on. My friends are amazing. Another man entered my life over 20 years ago. George. My biological father. He searched for me and then waited. Hoping someday I’d knock on his door. A man I never knew existed. Another story I’ll save for later. Sent me a sweet 16 birthday card and gift when I was in my 30s because he wasn’t there when I celebrated. He is where I got my stubborn streak. He gave me away when I married Troy. He is the one who named me Lorene Marie. He is amazing. I could ramble all day telling you all the amazing people in my life. I’ll have to continue another time. My children deserve a page to themselves. It’s time to get moving and dressed for another day in paradise. Go out and be amazing today! Blessings my friends Lorene
Made it to yet another Monday. They come so fast! You are leaving work on Friday, wake up Saturday, and poof! Monday And here I sit with my coffee in the dark. I have a blanket over my shoulders, it’s a bit cool and the ceiling fan gave me goosebumps when I first sat down. I have a lot of planning to do this morning, I have 4 days to make sure everything is lined up at work so no one has to scramble while I’m off for surgery. I’m just a text away but I don’t want to stress my staff. I’m sure they will be rockstars while I’m gone. But I feel guilty leaving them. I know I cant do everything by myself. But I do put in the effort. It’s hard for me to sit still. It’s hard for me to except help at times too. Depending on others is not easy for me. I am getting much better at it than I used to be. Delegating some things at work, asking Troy for help at home, asking for help in general is a struggle for me. I am still learning it is ok to ask for help. It does not make you a weak person. It actually makes you stronger. A stronger leader, partner, friend. Showing other others you trust them to help you sends them a message. A message of importance and trust. You are reaching out to someone during a vulnerable moment. This is also true when you are on the other side of that request. Being asking for help is an honor. Someone trusts you, believes you can do it and doesn’t worry about you failing. You are reaching back out to them while helping. Don’t think of asking for help as a weakness. Think of it as strengthening your relationships, building confidence in one another, and letting someone know you need them in your life. Next week I may be reaching out for a little help, if I do, know it’s because I trust you will do your best and knock it out of the park. And I don’t have to worry. I’ll say please and thank you now, I don’t know how my brain will do on the drugs. I may want to apologize in advance. 😳 May you have a blessed week, a beautiful Monday and I hope someone reaches out to you today and you learn how much they trust you. Lorene
It has been a little rough getting back to normal. If you want to call it normal. It’s no longer the same. Another hole in my existence. I have been through this before, and eventually I will fill it up with memories. Not all the way, there never seems to be enough to do that. It is in that small dark place I still grieve. It has been almost 40 years since my Daddy left us. There are times I still cry. I don’t remember his voice, but I do remember a clicking sound he made with his tongue when he had one too many cocktails. And the body shop smells. Bondo. Paint. 2006 I lost my mom. I see her every day when I look in the mirror. No denying we are related. Sometimes her words escape my mouth. I remember her eyes. They lost the twinkle when Daddy died. I don’t remember ever seeing it again. And now, my Father. A fresh wound to the heart. Fresh memories to store. I’m sure I will remember his gruff voice and gentle hands. The way I would catch him looking at me like he wasn’t sure if I was real. We were still new to each other. We didn’t dwell on the past much, just worked on the present. I know I will go through this again, not in the near future, I pray. Losing a parent isn’t easy. Even when you know its the way nature is designed. I will hang on to my last one, she is a feisty woman who has shown me love and compassion when she didn’t have to. I hope I absorbed and learned as much as I could to survive this life, and live it to it’s fullest. I hope I never stop seeing them in the mirror. Hearing their words cross my lips, or feel that little black hole on occasion. I want to remember. I want to celebrate them. I want to cry. I want to remember all I can. Let the memories comfort me. Until we see each other again. And get back to normal because that’s what they expect of me. Living their legacy while forging my own. They taught me to Love Big, Lorene
